Monday, November 26, 2012

Women are the toughest creatures, ever!

 I did a lot of travelling this weekend. I travelled to Namanga… in a shuttle. On my way, I observed Maasai men their traditional attire, sitted by the roadside and along corridors of shopping centers (I recall a Critical and Creative Thinking lecturer’s story about an old Maasai man who had a son in the USA. The son sent his father 7 underwear garments… each for one day of the week. He was so proud of his son, and he wanted to show-off his son’s gift. On the first Sunday, after receiving the underwear garments, he wore one of them and took it off that evening, before going to bed. On Monday-a local market day- he woke up in a hurry to get his favourite sitting-spot in the market. He forgot to put on the Monday underwear. He got his favourite spot, and spread his legs, so that everyone would see what he had put on. Everyone peeped to see what he had to show, and with pride, he kept telling them “Look carefully because I have seven of these. I’ll be in another one tomorrow”).
Back to the story about men sitting and idling around. While the Maasai men idled in the sun, their women were busy building houses (Maasais call them Manyatta), trekking long distances to get just 20 litres of water. Their women were feigning for their families.  We would see them busy making ornaments for sale and doing odd jobs…just to make ends meet. They are responsible for their families. One more thing: If a man in the Maasai community doesn’t have an expectant wife, then he is not considered to be man enough. Therefore, most wives were pregnant, even as much as they were busy looking out for their husbands and kids.
Why does life have to be this unfair to women? Does it have to be this much of a challenge, just because one was born with a vagina a woman? I vividly remember being irritated by this situation and I also remember telling one of the passengers in the shuttle that I thank God I was not born a Maasai because if I was a Maasai, I’d have been a badly-behaved woman. I wouldn’t have settled for less (Please note that am not whining about being born a woman, am only raising my concern about how life is unfair to the well-behaved women).
 On a more personal level, I had my own share of “female misfortunes” this morning…especially with today being a Monday. My red friends visited me yesterday, after delaying their schedule by a day. I was prepared to have a rigorous warm and comforting shower in the morning. I got an unpleasant shock when I woke up to darkness. There was no power and  I was late.  I had to take an ice-cold shower, with my red friends made it worse with the pain in the cold. I didn’t like it. Only God knows the status of my house when I left it. I didn’t get time to clean-up my house.  It was in a mess. I was almost cursing for being born a woman.
Last weekend, I went swimming and made a friend in the process.  Margaret, is her name. A beautiful  and charming young woman.  She’s the lifeguard at the swimming pool. She told me her story: She got pregnant of her boyfriend immediately after high school. The boyfriend then abandoned her. She was left with a kid to take care of, all by herself. At such a young age, she was forced to raise another tiny human.  (Here in my country, there’s no such thing as child-support or garnishee. The woman bears the pain and the burden of raising the kid. In addition to this, abortion is a crime. Do you see why I think that being a woman is hard...and that women are tough because they get on with it?).
In my life, there is no time such as now that I have been more convinced that it pays to be a badly-behaved woman. Not only are you exempted from all the misery and misfortunes of being a well-behaved woman,  you also gain respect from everyone…  you get an opportunity to make history, to be what you want to be, and to do that which you want to do.
However, being a badly-behaved woman comes at a cost: to understand the cost, it is imperative that you understand this:  No matter how lonely a lion may get, it will not spend an evening with a zebra. That is not pride, it’s just who the lion is. Lions and zebras don’t hang out together and that is not pride, that is just who the lion is.
Don’t hang out with zebras, if you know that you are a lion.
To all women, with love,
Judy.

2 comments:

  1. Hahaha!. The story about the Maasai just cracked me, what? he had seven of nothing? hehehe!!. Any way about women being special i concur with you 100% Judy, and more so the African women. This reminds of a story I was sent by a friend sometime back. The story goes like this. One day a boy saw her mom crying and he asked her "Why are you crying, a young boy asked his Mom?, "Because I'm a woman," she told him. "I don't understand," he said. His Mom just hugged him and said,
    "And you never will, but that's O.K.".... Later the little boy asked his father, "Why does Mom seem to cry for no reason?".
    "All women cry for no reason," was all his Dad could say.....The little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why women cry.
    Finally he put in a call to God and when God got back to him, he asked "God, why do women cry so easily?". GOD answered...... "When I made woman,
    I decided she had to be special. I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world, yet, made her arms gentle enough to give comfort... I gave her the inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times will come even from her own children. I gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going and take care of her family and friends, even when everyone else gives up, through sickness and fatigue without complaining.... I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances. Even when her child has hurt her badly.... She has the very special power to make a child's boo-boo feel better and to quell a teenager's anxieties and fears.... I gave her strength to care for her husband, despite faults and I fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart.... I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly.... For all of this hard work, I also gave her a tear to shed. It is hers to use whenever needed and ! it is her only weakness.... When you see her cry, tell her how much you love her, and all she does for everyone, and even though she may still cry,
    you will have made her heart feel good. Women are special!".

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